Let's just get it over with....

My Mama is has been getting on my case because I haven't talked about my brother on my new blog. I don't think I'll ever get from under the iron clad regime of Kim Jen-Il. So I'm just going to toe the line. I'm not sure what to say about him. I guess one thing that comes to mind is that he has a really good memory. An amazing one actually. For instance he'll be digging up the edge of the carpeting in one area of the house, then my Dad will pick him up and take him to an area of the house as far away as possible. He does this in the hope that he'll completely forget about what he was doing like most cats do. Not Carty. He trots right back to where he was and picks right up where he was. He has a memory like an elephant. Where does that saying come from anyway? Do elephants really have good memories? I only met one elephant in my life. At the zoo one time. He didn't really strike me as someone with a really good memory. I found his thoughts on the issue of animals held in captivity to be insightful, but nothing about his memory really stuck out. I think that saying is a bunch of bullshit. Where did the saying "three sheets to the wind" come from also? Can somebody tell me? Anyway, Carty has a really good memory. Unfortunately he never does anything that allows him to memorize anything useful. It's mostly a bunch of meaningless crap. Stuff like being able to name every pro hockey team's starting goalie, dinner time(he never forgets that), all of our friends and relatives birthdays. The most recent example was when we were telling ghost stories the other night. No, I still haven't figured out why we were telling ghost stories. You might remember me mentioning Carty's story really sucked. We'll Carty didn't know that the purpose of a ghost story was to be scary. He was the first one to tell a story and he just thought that it needed to be a story that involved ghosts. Where his memory comes into play is where he for some unknown reason remembered that James Brown, Gerald Ford, Anna Nicole Smith and Barbaro all died around the same time. So he figured the four of them would be the ghost in his ghost story. One scene in his story had Gerald Ford convincing the Secretary of the Navy to commission a battleship for James Brown. I was called the USS Sex Machine. The next scene has Barbaro ridding Anna Nicole to a win in the Belmont. Yes, that is the right order. Barbaro rode Anna Nicole (insert Anna Nicole being ridden joke here). We took the flash light away from him when he began describing a scene that involved the four of them dancing a choreographed number to "I feel Good". One last thing on Carty. His is looking into buying Flaco's ride. It's '72 Impala. If you don't remember Flaco is our high grade nip dealer. Carty considers him a friend. I consider him an asshole. We'll high gas prices are even hitting criminals in the pocket book these days. Flaco is looking to unload his Impala. He going to start dealing out of a Prius. The Impala has been sitting for sale on our block for weeks. Good luck getting the scratch together on it Carty.



Finally, now that I have my own post I added some tags to generate more hits. I found out what the top three things Googled by both males and females (6 items total). You can see them at the bottom of the post. You can probably guess which ones are for males and which ones are for females. I'll let you know how it works. You can try if for your own blog, if you have one.